Less than 70: The Ants and the Grasshopper

by PROFESSOR STUART GUMBIE, BS, MS, PhD, FOS, NCCM

 The ants were spending a fine winter’s day drying grain collected in the summertime. A Grasshopper, perishing with famine, passed by and earnestly begged for a little food. The Ants inquired of him, “Why did you not treasure up food during the summer?” He replied, “I had not leisure enough. I passed the days in singing.” Then they said in derision: If you were foolish enough to sing all summer, you must dance supperless to bed in the winter.

Aesop’s fables are still as applicable today as they were when Aesop wrote them 2,500 years ago. We are in need of a moral education today just as much as Aesop’s students were in ancient Greece. Given the pace of life in the 21st century and the interconnectedness of seemingly disjointed events, perhaps we need such a moral education now more than ever.

Aesop’s genius was his efficient simplicity. In a few short sentences, Aesop communicated timeless lessons. We need this kind of efficiency today, with our hectic, compressed and noisy lives. Fortunately, we can turn to Aesop’s simple wisdom for guidance. We must be like The Ants.

In this age, information is transmitted instantaneously, and resources to make enlightened and informed decision are but a mouse-click away. We need an algorithm to process that information as quickly and as efficiently as possible in order to come to the most convenient decision possible. We must act impulsively.

When presented with new information, the most efficient process is to quickly scan the crumbs of knowledge at your disposal for those that already fit into your current world view. Trust in your preconceived notions and simply cherry pick whatever evidence supports those preconceptions. By doing this, you leverage previously accumulated knowledge. Simply parking lot any information that does not harmonize with your preexisting biases. This kind of impulsive prudence is an effective and value-added information management system.

The ability to make a truly informed decision is impossible. New information is always becoming available. In a less frantic world, prudence may have been a virtue. But we now live in an era where we are constantly being bombarded by new pieces of evidence; prudence has become a phase two virtue: that is, it is unrealistic. Divining what is “right” and “proper” is a waste of time, like putting socks on an octopus.

We live in a hyper-competitive world in which the strongest idea dominates. To position yourself in this marketplace requires ambition, focus, and constancy. Discernment weakens your personal brand by providing constant push-back, leading towards indecision, and indecision is a poison pill in building your personal brand.

Prudence is a two-faced monster that damages your personal brand. In the marketplace of ideas–which, depending on your state of life, may be your family, your circle of friends, your co-workers, or your electorate–you need to package your ideas consistently so that the consumers will know what they are getting. The goal of a personal brand, then is to present a clear and consistent image of what you stand for in order to build disciples, followers, and lackeys. By indulging prudence, you risk baiting your consumers, only to switch them to another brand. Prudence undermines the consistency necessary to build your brand.

Prudence also damages your brand because it is slow. Time-to-market is a critical factor in determining the success of your brand. The first product to market has a significant competitive advantage over any latecomers. This truism is just as important in the marketplace of ideas. When you act prudently, you waste time that should be spent in establishing your personal brand in the market. While you are judiciously weighing the evidence, discerning what is “right” from “wrong,” and then determining the proper course of action, your more impulsive competitors will have been first to market, and you will be forever trying to catch up.

A practical example may show exactly what I mean about the advantage of impulsive prudence. Back in October, President Obama dispatched 100 troops to Uganda to help fight the Lord’s Resistance Army. On his radio show, Rush Limbaugh criticized this decision, saying that the President is sending troops to “wipe out Christians in Sudan, Uganda.” Had Rush Limbaugh acted with prudence, he would have done the research on the Lord’s Resistance Army, and realized that this “army” is little more than a bizarre death cult. But had he done so, it would have undermined his brand image, which is one of vehement opposition to the Obama Administration. Rather, Rush Limbaugh acted impulsively, thereby positioning his brand in the marketplace of ideas. If he did his research before he spoke, and realized that the LRA are the bad guys, he would have been in the untenable position of actually supporting the President. Prudence would have undermined his brand.

If Aesop were alive today, he may have written the fable thusly:

The Ants were spending a fine fall day collecting as many seeds as possible before winter. A Grasshopper prudently and carefully selected the most nutritious seeds. When winter came, the Ants mocked the Grasshopper, saying, “Why did you not treasure up more seeds. Our stockpiles are full, while yours is half empty.”  He replied, “I acted prudently. I passed the days deciding carefully, selecting only the best seeds, while what you thought were seeds are but empty husks of no value.” Then they said in derision: “While they may be empty husks, we still have more than you!”

 The moral of this fable: It is prudent to act impulsively to get attention today.

Filed under: Less Than 70, Uncategorized, Aesop, Aesop's Fables, LRA, Prudence, Rush Limbaugh, The Ants and the Grasshopper, Virtue

Sympathy for Bill Maher

Social media has given a voice to the voiceless. But its rise in popularity seems to have brought with it a loss in the art of listening. The virtues of silence, sincerity, and moderation seem to have little place in the age of Facebook and Twitter. In today’s program, we discuss the role these virtues play in the world of social media.

TRANSCRIPT

BOB BURNHAM, host: Happy New Year, and welcome to the first Moron Quotient of 2012. I am your host, Bob Burnham. After the Denver Broncos 40-14 loss to the Buffalo Bills, comedian Bill Maher issued a now infamous tweet, mocking Broncos’ quarterback, and apparent Messiah, Tim Tebow.

That tweet did not win Bill Maher any new friends. Calls for a boycott of Maher’s show on HBO have been accompanied by his expulsion from the liberal barn by Bob Beckel, and his condemnation to Hell by Eric Bolling.

These are strong words. But are they really helpful? Do such strong statements really do anything productive? In a world where speaking has more value than listening, do such virtues as silence, sincerity, and moderation have a place?

Joining us in a little while will be our Panel of Morons. But first I’d like to introduce a man of wealth and taste: the Prince of Darkness, the Morning Star, Satan. Satan, welcome to the Moron Quotient.

SATAN: Please to meet you. Just call me Lucifer.

BOB: So Satan–excuse me, Lucifer–do you see a lack of virtue in public discourse, and do you see it as a problem?

SATAN: Is there a lack of virtue? Sure there is. But is it a problem? I really don’t think so. First of all, humans have only inconsistently and half-heartedly applied virtues to their actions. Social media just amplifies this inherent lack of virtue. Second, what good is virtue anyway?

BOB: Don’t virtues help us determine between right and wrong? Don’t they help us to do unto others as you would have them do unto you?

SATAN: That sounds noble, but it is hardly practical, isn’t it? What is more practical is to do unto others as they do unto you.

BOB: You mean, an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth?

SATAN: Exactly. And if you see, if you look at what has happened in the wake of Bill Maher’s tweet, you see exactly how this is put into practice. Tim Tebow’s public display of faith challenges Bill Maher’s world view. Maher responds in kind, which offends Eric Bolling and Bob Beckel, who decide to offend Maher. It’s this escalation of offense. They are all pursuing their own self-interest. That is the only virtue I know of.

BOB: But how does that build tolerance?

SATAN: It doesn’t, and that’s the point–I foster  intolerance. That’s the nature of my game. You forget that I have been around for a long, long time, and have seen many moments of doubt an pain.

BOB: So, you see nothing wrong in Eric Bolling calling Bill Maher  ”disgusting vile trash” and wishing that he would go straight to Hell?

SATAN: Look, if the only virtue is to act in one’s own self-interest, then that is an entirely virtuous act. Besides, I’d love to have Bill Maher down there. Hell could use a few laughs.

BOB: And Bill Maher, saying that you were celebrating the Broncos’ loss? Is there nothing wrong with that?

SATAN: Well, yeah, but not for the reason he thinks. I mean, if people think that God has anything to do with the Denver Broncos winning, and if they use that to support heir faith, then that makes my job so much easier. No, the reason I was celebrating is because I’m a Raiders fan, and a Denver loss will help my team get into the playoffs!

BOB: It looks to me like the only person who rose above this whole scandal is the man who was the target of Bill Maher’s attack, Tim Tebow. Satan, I know you have to go, but thank you for stopping by and sharing your views.

SATAN: No problem, Bob. It’s been my pleasure. And don’t worry, I’m not going away anytime soon.

BOB: I’d now like to turn to our Panel of Morons. I am joined by Professor Stuart Gumbie and Gov. Samuel Bribescam. Professor, Governor, Happy New Year to you both.

PROF. STUART GUMBIE, B.S., M.S, Ph.D, FOS, NCCS: Happy New Year, Bob. Glad to be here.

GOV. SAMUEL “SANDY” BRIBESCAM, former Democratic Governor: Hi Bob. Happy New Year to you too.

BOB: Professor, let me start with you. Having heard what Satan had to say, what is your opinion. Is there a lack of virtue in what passes for public discourse?

PROF. GUMBIE: Well, I think the situation is a little more complicated. In my book,  Modeling Morality: How to Make Morality Your Brand, I explain that what we call “virtues” are boundary values for the equations that model behavior. The variables in these equation are ambition, ego, envy, and conflict.

BOB: And these are what you call your “factors of motivation?”

PROF. GUMBIE: Exactly. Virtues provide limits on each of those factors in order to maximize value. The correct limits, of course, vary from situation to situation.

BOB: So virtues, as we know them, are not stable, but vary from situation to situation?

GOV. BRIBESCAM: You see this all the time in politics. We are not motivated to do what is virtuous or right. We are motivated by what is expedient. The trick, though, is the spin. How do we make our actions, dictated as they are by what is politically expedient, seem virtuous?

BOB: That’s very cynical.

GOV. BRIBESCAM: It’s politics. Virtue doesn’t have the same political value that wealth and the power that flows from it does.

PROF. GUMBIE: That’s why you need to make virtue part of your brand image.

BOB: I still think that society would be better served if we spoke only that which benefits others, using no hurtful deceit. We should think honestly and justly, and speak accordingly.

GOV. BRIBESCAM: You’ll never win elected office with that attitude.

BOB:  I’m afraid that is all the time we have for today’s show. I’d like to thank our two panelists, Professor Gumbie and Governor Bribescam for joining me today.

PROF. GUMBIE: Thank you, Bob.

GOV. BRIBESCAM: It’s been a pleasure, as always.

BOB: And may all of you have a Happy New Year, and may it be a year filled with peace and goodness!

Filed under: National News, #straightohellBill, Bill Maher, Satan, Sympathy for the Devil, Tim Tebow, Virute

Less than 70: “The War on Labor Day”

by GOVERNOR SAMUEL “SANDY” BRIBESCAM

The first Monday of September honors a fine American tradition. On this day, which marks the transition from summer to fall, Americans across this great nation honor the American worker. Since 1882, when the first Labor Day was celebrated in New York City, people have gathered to recognize the contributions made by American workers to our collective social and economic achievement. Indeed, the vital force of the American worker has added to the highest standard of living the world has ever known.

But Labor Day doesn’t feel like Labor Day anymore. From its humble beginnings in New York City, this tradition spread from city to city, from state to state; by 1894, Labor Day was a national holiday. People came together to remember workers’ sacrifices by hosting parades; they listened to speeches that extolled the virtues of labor; communities came forward to say “thank you” to those virtuous men and women who built this country and added to its great wealth with their sweat and toil.

Today, however, there is an ongoing war against Labor Day. The plutocrats and oligarchs that own the political process have waged an unrelenting assault on this noble holiday. By attacking Labor Day, this tiny minority wishes to strip the American workers of their dignity, and erase the sacrifices labor has made to help America live up to its promise. It is an attack on labor itself, on the dignity of work, and the history of our nation. In its stead, the plutocrats and oligarchs are indoctrinating the people with their antisocial dogmas of conspicuous consumption, greed, and exploitation.

We no longer hear speeches by organized labor anymore. The ubiquitous Labor Day parade has lost its unique characteristics, having devolved into an insipid clone of the 4th of July Parade or Memorial Day parade. Labor Day is subsumed under the umbrella of a civic festival that marks the end of summer. The parades that once served to honor the long struggle for workers’ rights are now little more than an addendum to weekend-long “Fall Fling” celebrations. No longer do we hear speeches reminding us of the battles fought for the just and favorable working conditions we now take for granted. Rather, these festivals feature carnivals and concerts that ignore our responsibility to remember our past and traditions. These indulgences have stripped Labor Day of its true meaning.

This onslaught on this privileged holiday by the plutocrats and oligarchs has finally begun to bear fruit. Union membership is in decline, and fewer Americans than ever value the labor movement. Only 52% of Americans see unions as a force for good. This is  down from an all time high of 75% in the 1950s. Meanwhile, 42% of Americans disapprove of labor unions, up from an all time low of 14%. The plutocrats and oligarchs are succeeding in stripping away Americans their hard-won rights, and seek to transform the American worker into an indentured servant.

The Founding Fathers understood the importance of the right to organize, and enshrined this principle in the Bill of Rights with the 1st Amendment:

“Congress shall make no law . . . or [abridging] the right of the people peaceably to assemble ; and to petition the Government for the redress of grievances.”

The right to form unions–that is, to “peaceably assemble”–and the right for public employee unions to collectively bargain–that is, to “petition the Government for the redress of grievances”–are surely protected by the Constitution. Furthermore, the 9th Amendment guarantees that rights not explicitly enumerated in the Constitution–such as the right to favorable working conditions, equal pay, rest and leisure, and an adequate standard of living, are retained by the people.  The attacks by the plutocrats and oligarchs clearly go against the intent and vision of our Founding Fathers.

The Founding Fathers envisioned a productive, industrious nation where workers formed the backbone of the economy (after all, how many of them earned a fortune from the toil of chattel slavery?). Throughout our nation’s great history, workers have done for themselves what the state has failed to do: create and maintain a vibrant middle class, providing evidence that the national pursuit for happiness is making progress. This is the real reason the plutocrats and oligarchs hate organized labor: unions help ensure a more just and equitable economy, and in turn, a more just and equitable society. Knowing this, the tycoons who have usurped our democracy and subjected us to the tyranny of greed wage an ongoing war against the American worker, sterilizing the fertility of labor.

Labor Day itself may be a casualty of that war.

Filed under: National News, Less Than 70, War on Christmas, Labor Day, Bill of Rights, Unions, Colorado Labor Wars, Plutocracy, Oligarchs

Operation Santa’s Slay

The debate over the proper place of religion in the public sphere heats up every Christmas. This “war” on Christmas conflates the cultural and commercial symbols of Christmas with its theological meaning. But these symbols are entirely irrelevant to the the true meaning of the Christmas.

TRANSCRIPT

BOB BURNHAM, host: Welcome to the Moron Quotient, I am your host, Bob Burnham. Nativity scenes are dismantled across the nation. Christmas trees are renamed “Holiday” trees. People are forced to say “Happy Holidays” instead of “Merry Christmas.” The War on Christmas continues.

But is there really a “war” on Christmas? According to the a recent Gallup poll, 95% of Americans celebrate Christmas; 51% of whom say the holiday is strongly religious for them. This continues an upward trend since 1990, when only 40% said it was strongly religious. And the percent of people who say it is not too religious is down from 20% to 17%.

Joining me to discuss this issue are two of our distinguished panelists from the Panel of Morons, Ben D. Over, of KRAP Radio, and Madame Goo-Goo. Ben, Madame, thanks for joining me on today’s program.

BEND D. OVER, radio talk show host: Bob.

MADAME GOO-GOO: Merry Christmas, Bob and Ben! I’m so glad to be here!

BOB: We are also joined by someone who can be best described by the words “stink, stank, stunk”: The Grinch Who Stole Christmas. Mr. Grinch, welcome to the Moron Quotient.

THE GRINCH, who stole Christmas: Thank you for having me, Bob, on your show, and here is a “ba-humbug” instead of a “ho-ho-ho!”

BOB: Ben, is there a war being waged on Christmas?

OVER: Absolutely! There is something very wrong in this country when kids cannot openly celebrate Christmas in public, or our elected representatives in Congress cannot send out Christmas cards. It’s just another example of the erosion of our country’s moral foundation.

BOB: Aren’t you overstating things a bit? Members of Congress are prohibited by a federal law passed in 1974 that forbids using the Congressional Post Office for sending birthday, anniversary, retirement, or similar greetings, including holiday greetings.

GOO-GOO:  Ben, Christmas is everywhere, it’s pervasive. Christmas is a tremendous presence that can overcome people of other faiths.

GRINCH: Every Who down in Who-ville, the tall and the small, will stand close together… with Christmas bells ringing. They’ll stand hand in hand… and those Whos… will start singing! And they’ll feast, and they’ll feast. And they’ll feast, feast, feast, feast! They’ll feast on Who pudding and rare Who roast beast. Aw, roast beast is a feast I can’t stand in the least!

GOO-GOO: Shouldn’t we give people like Mr. Grinch a choice? Should he not be free from having the Who’s faith–a faith he does not share–forced upon him?

OVER: What you call “choice” is nothing but an intensifying persecution of Christianity by cultural Marxists who demand that we acquiesce to lies.

GOO-GOO: I’m sorry, Ben, but what lies are you talking about?

OVER: The lies of multiculturalism. This crazy, pervasive political correctness that stifles dissent and stigmatizes social heresy!

BOB:  Mr. Grinch, are you waging a war on Christmas?

GRINCH:  I must stop this whole thing. Why, for fifty-three years I’ve put up with it now. I must stop Christmas from coming, but how?

OVER: By helping Comrade Obama implement his secular socialist agenda, that’s how!

GOO-GOO:  Or by cutting unemployment insurance or raising taxes on the middle class.

BOB: But why, Mr. Grinch, do you hate Christmas so much? Is it that your shoes are on too tight, or is it that your heart is two sizes too small?

GRINCH: I rage against Christmas for one simple reason, and that is that I hate the whole Christmas season! I hate all the singing and Christmas bells ringing. That’s one thing I hate! All the noise, noise, noise! And the Who’s play noisy games like zoozit and kazay, a rollerskate type of lacrosse and croquet!

OVER: You see? The cultural Marxists behind the secular socialization of America are eroding our values stripping Christianity from the public sphere under the tyranny of so-called “political correctness!” Multiculturalism does not work!

GOO-GOO: What you call “political correctness” I call “tolerance,” Ben. If everyone just took the time to be patient and nice, you’ll have good results. You just need to put your preconceived notions about the “other” aside.

BOB: Just because people say “Happy Holidays” or “Season’s Greetings” instead of “Merry Christmas,” does that really constitute a war? And if by calling a Christmas tree a “Holiday” tree make the spirit of the season more inclusive, isn’t that a good thing?

GOO-GOO: Yeah, you know, peace on earth and goodwill to all human kind?

OVER: The two of you nauseate me. You are simply waging a covert war on the American way of life.

GRINCH: I am puzzled, and now my puzzler is sore. I think I thought of something I haven’t before.  People will celebrate Christmas, the tall and the small, without any Christmas trees or Nativities at all! Christmas isn’t about what you see in a park! Christmas is about what lives in your heart!

BOB: Mr. Grinch, I think your heart has grown three sizes today.

OVER:  Your souls are an appalling dung heap overflowing with most disgraceful assortment of deplorable rubbish imaginable.

GOO-GOO: And I think Ben’s heart has shrunk a size or two.

BOB: And I’m afraid we are out of time. I’d like to thank our guests: Ben, Madame, and Mr. Grinch.

GOO-GOO: Thank you, Bob! Merry Christmas, Happy New Year, and peace, love, and happiness!

OVER:  Merry CHRIST-mas. And let’s keep the Christ in Christmas.

GRINCH: Merry Christmas, to all of you, and may your Christmas wishes all come true!

BOB: And whatever your faith tradition is, may you be blessed with all peace and goodness. And let us all work together to build a more fraternal world based on love and respet for all our brothers and sisters.

May there be peace on earth, and let it begin with each one of us.

Filed under: National News, War on Christmas, Christmas, Cultrual Marxism, The Grinch Who Stole Christmas, Multiculturalism, Religion, Religious Freedom, Religious Tolerance